Soup & Salad Invitation


I was listening to a podcast recently and the woman who was sharing said that she had interacted with another woman at her church who said that she often makes a huge pot of soup and some salad, on a Sunday morning, and will intentionally look for people sitting alone in service to invite them over for a meal with her and her family. And. I. Loved. That.

I have said this before, and I will say it again... invite singles over, even into the mess. Invite singles into your life, into the 'mundane' of errand running and laundry folding. Invite them to the athletic events and the theater performances. Let them be part of your family. 

For whatever reason, the Lord has not deemed it time (now or maybe ever) to give them a spouse or family of their own, but they are ever much as created for relationship as someone who the Lord has deemed time to be married/have a family. And, for the love, quit seeing or telling singles that they are less valuable or that their lives will be incomplete because they're lacking marriage. It is simply untrue. 

Anyone can make it through life without sex but making it through life without intimacy is another thing. Intimacy is not just sexual relationship. By definition, it is to know and be known. Singles do not have the option of being known, emotionally, mentally, relationally by a spouse but that doesn't mean they are to be known any less. So how much more is it needed for a single human (who is already whole, might I add) to be in community, to be invited into family, and to be known by others? It is vital. I'd go as far to say that it is life changing. The church needs to be better in this area.

We need to stop seeing singleness for what it's not and start spotlighting what it is. You have not made it because you're married. If marriage was the absolute pinnacle for life, then that's what all our weight and glory would be focused on. You have made it when you glorify God with all you are and you relentlessly pursue Him with every fiber of your being, single or married. God has designed marriage as a wonderful gift but so has he designed singleness as a wonderful gift. 

So, I urge again, invite them in. Married friends and family, create space for the singles in your lives to know and be known. Allow them to speak into your families and your marriages and point you towards Jesus. Singles, quit seeing yourself as less than because you don't have someone and quit playing a victim. Pursue the responsibilities and relationships that God has placed in your lives and live fully into the season you have been given. 

Whether married or single, our goal should be the pursuit of Christ Alone. Both are beautiful in their own make up and both are difficult in their own make up. I am single. And some of the greatest times (away from my nuclear family's home) have been hanging at a family's house on a Sunday afternoon, watching football, eating a home cooked meal, and being allowed to come and go as I need. We do life together and that cup is filled by good, righteous, holy communion.

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