Loving your single life.


I am not sure how I want to start this post. There are so many things I could say! I guess I will start with, I have been apart of and/or overheard some interesting conversations about singleness amongst my circles. I have been encouraged by a lot of it because honestly, the groups I run with are largely single young adults (shocking, I am sure). A couple months ago someone posed the question to someone else "What do you think about arranged marriages?" And the response was so quickly "I am for them". I was like "say what?" But the person went on to explain that if you have family and friends that know you really well and then He has family or friends that know him really well then a "set up" might not be so bad. That got my gears turning. I just stood there like "oh, well I guess that's a fair point".

Fast forward a bit, I was sitting around with some friends a couple weeks ago and we were talking about our "types". You know, the kind of men that we are drawn to and attracted to. That conversation got me thinking a little more about the guy that I want in my life one day. And one of the girls said "I don't know if I want be married enough to date seriously again (paraphrased, it's been a minute). Again, gears turning.

    Just recently I listened to the podcast "That sounds fun!" by Annie F. Downs and the particular topic was on singleness and she answered questions about it in rapid fire form. I think throughout the entire episode she went through about 100+ questions and gave her answers. People asked about dating again after heartbreak, feeling like they have to put out all the effort, giving people who know you permission to set you up, what to do with your sex drive when you've chosen to wait, online dating, not feeling good enough, and so many more. I highly suggest listening to it if you haven't because it was really encouraging! Ps. Here's the permission if you know a man who loves Jesus (actually bears fruit and has a great sense of humor) (there are many more characteristics but I feel those don't go hand in hand sometimes). 

    With all that in mind, here's the thing about where I am with singleness. Since moving to WI, I had thoughts and hopes that my guy would be coming out of the Wisconsin woodwork (and he still might, it's early). But what I found was that I am totally content where I am at the moment. I want to make friends and be a friend, I want to say yes to as many things as I have margin for and build depth in relationships, I want to bounce around and make memories, and I want to run after Jesus with everything in me and do my job(s) and school to the best of my ability. If a man decides he wants to run alongside me then by golly, c'mon and I hope the feeling would be reciprocated to run alongside him. 
     I want to make the most of the season I am in. Are there days that are tougher than others? Sure. But I know Jesus has me right where He wants me and until that scene changes, I want to love my single life. 
    So my friend who may struggle with being single, you are not alone. Maybe take small steps to enjoy your season and do as many things as you want before you are responsible to someone else. Travel, work hard, be a good friend, work on the icky parts of yourself, lean into Jesus, care for others, volunteer, play a sport/workout, invite people into your apartment/home, pick up a hobby. Just don't look back and say "I wish I would have done that while I was single" because time stinking flies.

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