Finishing what I started

     I love book ends. I love finishing what I've started and I really like to fix things that are broken, if I can. There's been a lot in my life, especially over this past year where I have seen the beauty of book ends happen but at the same time there have also been many instances where things have started that have gone unfinished and things have broken that can't be fixed.
    One of the things that I started last year was working at a camp called Deer Run. I thought I was done with the camp life but I decided to work it again so that my boyfriend at the time and myself could continue to grow in our relationship by working together for the summer! It was new territory but camp is something I love and something I (think) I'm good at. We were excited and signed up to work the whole summer (at this camp you can choose to work whole or half). A few weeks in things began to shift a little and excitement faded away and we decided to step down and finish out the first session and not continue the rest of the summer.
     This was a difficult decision for me because I didn't quite feel like I was supposed to leave but at the same time, the whole point was to spend time together and grow. So we left. And that was that.
Ever since quitting (mind you, the first thing I've ever quit in my life for a not super legitimate reason) I've had this little need inside of me to finish what I started.
    Summer rolled back around and camps started up again and I still had that little twinge inside, prompting me to finish what I started. I didn't know how to go about that! I have two great jobs and people I'm trying to get to know better and a full life going on. Camp is done, it's over. Then I went to visit. I got there and spent a couple hours with returning staff and I felt like that's where I was supposed to be.
     So long story short, there haven't been many things this past year that I've been able to fix. If I have the opportunity to make a wrong right, I absolutely will do anything and everything I can to do so. But in those times where I can't, I have to give those things to the Lord. But this particular time, I get to fix what was broken and finish what I started. I will be working several weekend/family camps for Deer Run throughout the rest of the summer and I am so excited that the Lord provided this opportunity for me (as well as keeping my jobs I have right now).
    This is a book end. This is a broken thing fixed. This is a finish.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

But What if You're Single and.... Happy?

Image
I've been sent a few reels over the last couple months talking about singleness and the different feelings around it. One said that people will talk about 4 major relationship categories,  1. Married and happy 2. Married and unhappy 3. Single and happy 4. Single and unhappy And how one of the categories is talked about the least... can you guess which one?  It's #3: Single and Happy.  I've not done the research, so maybe that discounts all of what I'm saying or about to say, but as someone who routinely checkmarks the single box, my life and experiences are the research. Why is it that so few people talk about what it looks like to be single and happy? In my observation, it's because there often is one goal and one goal alone to strive for: "get married, have kids". And if those things are not happening then how could one possibly be fulfilled, whole, happy, or thriving? A good question.  But what if I told you there was something else? That single people ...
Read more

Awaiting the Holy Night - Mary's Perspective

Image
I wrote this post back in December 18, 2022 and never published it but with Christmas around the corner and joining my family in reading a chapter of Luke a day to celebrated Advent, I decided to circle back around to it. I know it may be taboo to read into how a Biblical character might have felt or what they might have thought, but adding personification to the people that we read so much about felt like an exciting venture. And besides that, The Chosen TV series came out around that time and it brought so many characters to life... giving them thoughts, feelings, and emotions so I felt that maybe I was in the clear (I mean, now anytime I read Jesus's words in Scripture, I hear Jonathan Roumie's voice). Below is my mind's rendering of how I imagined Mary (and Joseph) felt and what they might have thought the days leading up to and the night of Christ's birth.  --- What do you mean, I'm pregnant? Pregnant... at 15... with the coming Messiah?! I can't show my a...
Read more

Grief - It's Okay

Image
Grief. How does someone wrestle with the wounds it leaves?  It's a fog that covers a valley. It's a g-force against our lungs like we're on one of those carnival rides that spins so fast, you're pinned to a wall. It's a cloud that specifically rains on you when everything and everyone else is basking in sunshine. It's a numbness that can feel like an emotional void. And like a spinning record, it plays over and over again. Grief comes in all shapes and sizes from all sorts of occasions. There could be a seasonal grief due to weather changes and the days getting darker earlier after sunshine and late nights and warmth kissed you all summer. There's the grief of change: you move, you start a job / job ends, a bad grade occurs, your body isn't doing things the way it used to, and injury changes the course of what you thought life would look like. Then there's the relational grief. This is the one that surrounds you when you lose a relationship, when the...
Read more